Dad Starting Over

Dad Starting Over

Welcome to the Dad Starting Over podcast! "Starting Over" means different things to different people. It could be that you're newly divorced and starting over fresh with a new life. It could be that you're still married and wanting to hit the reset button and finally do things right within your marriage. Whatever your story may be, you're in the right place. I'm DSO, the author of books called "The Dead Bedroom Fix", "NOW WHAT?", and "Red Flags". You can learn more about me, my books, one-on-one coaching, and the member-only part of my site called the DSO Fraternity at dadstartingover.com. read less
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Episodes

Dear DSO: "I'm in Excellent Shape... But it's Still Not Enough For Her Libido!"
13-02-2024
Dear DSO: "I'm in Excellent Shape... But it's Still Not Enough For Her Libido!"
DSO comes face to face with a conundrum that plagues many married individuals – the struggle for consistent, fulfilling intimacy. The host addresses a listener's question concerning the frequency and nature of intimacy within marriage, offering his insights on the complexities of physical and emotional connections. With raw candor and a touch of humor, DSO delves into the nuanced challenges of igniting passion in a relationship marred by a disparity in sexual desires.The listener, adopting the moniker "Conan the Barbarian," reveals his endeavors in boosting physical fitness and providing romantic gestures, yet finds himself unsatisfied with the sporadic sexual encounters and hand jobs offered by his wife. DSO emphasizes the importance of understanding that attraction and intimacy encompass more than just physical appearance, hinting at possible deeper issues within the marriage. The episode addresses the dangers of communication breakdowns and the impact of emotional rifts on intimacy, urging listeners to explore the complexities lying beneath the surface of marital discord.Key Takeaways:Physical fitness is crucial for self-confidence and attractiveness, but it's not the sole factor in improving intimacy.Expressing discontent about intimacy through texts risks coming across as crass or immature, potentially fueling conflict.The lack of intimacy can signify deeper issues, including resentment or emotional disconnection within the relationship.Overcoming a "dead bedroom" situation requires more than addressing the physical aspects; it involves understanding and attending to both partners' emotional needs.Communication is key, but it must be approached sensitively and thoughtfully to avoid causing further harm to the relationship.
Dear DSO: "I Still Need MORE From My Wife!"
29-01-2024
Dear DSO: "I Still Need MORE From My Wife!"
DSO tackles a sensitive and commonly encountered issue in many marriages: the dynamics of sexual desire and satisfaction. Delve into Daniel's story, a listener who, despite having worked on improving his relationship and experiencing an uptick in bedroom activity, is grappling with the feeling that his wife's participation may not stem from genuine desire.DSO, with his blend of straightforward advice and empathetic insight, dissects the complexity behind the listener's concerns, pointing out the multifaceted nature of sexual desire and the psychological impetus driving our expectations. He addresses the delicate balance between increased frequency and the authenticity of sexual encounters within a marriage. Through real-life examples and an understanding of human sexual behaviour, DSO provides a nuanced overview of why, even with positive changes, some men, like Daniel, yearn for a more spontaneous and voracious sexual connection.Key Takeaways:Sexual desire within a marriage can be complicated, affected by changes in life stages, stress, and individual nature.Increasing sexual frequency doesn't always equate to satisfaction if the perceived level of genuine desire from the partner is lacking.Our biology might be programmed towards 'serial monogamy', seeking newness that inherently comes with a new partner.Realistic expectations and communication are essential in understanding and managing the complexities of marital sexual relationships.Exploring adventurous and shared sexual experiences may help ignite a stronger sexual connection between partners.